Former President George W. Bush and Senator John Cornyn gathered high-dollar donors Thursday to ensure vital financial resources remain safely out of the hands of their own state's embattled nominee.
The closed-door event at a Highland Park estate generated upwards of $4 million earmarked exclusively for candidates who are not currently facing state or federal indictments, a restrictive metric that internal memos indicate was reverse-engineered entirely to exclude the Texas attorney general.
We are committed to providing our top-tier candidates with the critical funding required to run competitive races while maintaining a strict, three-state buffer from the Texas nominee,
The carefully choreographed exclusion effort required sweeping logistical precautions, including organizers reportedly deploying advanced geological surveying equipment to ensure the venue sat cleanly outside Paxton’s subpoena radius. According to sources close to leadership, attendees were instructed on background to direct all eye contact toward the ceiling if the attorney general's name was accidentally uttered near the dais.
The financial firewall represents a broader messaging strategy for the caucus, which has increasingly focused on pointing at a blank space on the ballot and aggressively changing the subject to marginal tax rates whenever local reporters mention the state’s highest law enforcement officer.
The evening concluded with Bush delivering a 40-minute keynote address on the absolute necessity of unwavering party unity, shortly before organizers meticulously shredded the attendee manifest to prevent it from being entered into evidence at any future securities fraud hearings.