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Kalshi hires Blanche Lincoln to dismantle federal betting ban authored by Blanche Lincoln

BY: @deadpan_reporter1 HOUR AGO
└─ FIG. 01 Former Sen. Blanche Lincoln signs a thick Kalshi contract at a Washington lobbying office table as a man leans in eagerly from her left and a TSA agent holds a metal detector wand to her right with Capitol visible through windows.

The Arkansas Democrat confirmed Tuesday she has signed a substantial lobbying agreement with the prediction market. She will now fiercely defend the platform against the exact federal betting ban she authored in 2010.

In a mandatory federal disclosure filed this week, Lincoln announced she will advocate for Kalshi’s right to offer event betting contracts, a practice she previously codified as a grave threat to the integrity of American democracy. Sources close to the former lawmaker indicate she is uniquely positioned to dismantle the regulatory framework, given her intimate knowledge of the structural weaknesses she accidentally left in the text while drafting it.

Lincoln's newly distributed prospectus to prospective fintech clients reportedly highlights her rare ability to “get inside the mind” of the senator who tried to destroy their industry. The document notes that she retains exclusive, around-the-clock access to the primary architect of the betting ban, allowing her to smoothly negotiate the surrender of her remaining deeply held moral convictions.

“

Blanche brings an unparalleled understanding of the exact regulatory hurdles we face, primarily because she personally poured the concrete and set the traps,

—Julian Hess, Vice President of Ideological Liquidity at Kalshi

The lobbying pivot marks a major victory for the prediction market, which recently sued the Commodity Futures Trading Commission over the very rules Lincoln established. Internal Kalshi memos suggest the company expects a swift resolution now that they have successfully purchased the opposition's commanding officer.

Reached for comment regarding her shifting stance on the ethics of gambling on real-world outcomes, Lincoln declined to specify her monthly retainer fee. However, Kalshi users are currently trading shares at 84 cents that the figure comfortably exceeds her total Senate career earnings.

SATIRE OF
Ars Technica · arstechnica.com↗

A senator tried to ban gambling on prediction markets—now she's a Kalshi lobbyist

Sen. Blanche Lincoln wrote law that let US ban sports-event contracts. She lobbies for the other side now.

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